Do you ever wonder, is my child behind? Maybe they aren’t reading yet or haven’t managed to memorize the multiplication tables as early as you think they should have. How can you know if they’re really behind?
This is the first question I ask of any mom who tells me their child is behind. Behind according to who?
If a teacher or a doctor or your sister-in-law has told you that your child is behind, may I encourage you to take that with a grain of salt? After all, you know your child best. And just because your child might not be doing something on a timetable that someone else created doesn’t mean they are behind.
Out of my 10 children, I had babies who walked at 11 months, 12 months, 13 months, and 15 months.
Who gets to decide that the 15-month old was a late walker? He’s 22 now and he walks just fine, often walking upwards of 10 miles a day.
Why do you care?
If someone tells you that your child is behind, you need to figure out why you care what they think.
Is this a professional who is giving you solid advice? Or just a nosey friend or in-law who needs to mind their own business? if it’s the latter, just put it out of your mind.
If it’s a professional, take it with a grain of salt if it’s not a medical issue.
what to do about it
So, Johnny can’t read or Susie can’t multiply. What do you do about it?
First, find a few minutes to be alone and ask yourself some questions:
- Do you think there is a problem with where your child is?
- Is this just a matter of allowing the child to reach the next level of development?
- Would pushing your child help the situation or make it worse?
- Why do you care so much what others think about it?
- Are you doing your part to help your child?
If you are doing your job as a mom, you may want to sit back for a bit and let things play out. Pushing your child will nearly always result in tears and backward motion.
So, dear Mom, try to relax and let time work in your favor. Just like not all babies walk at 11 months, not all children read at 6 or know their times tables at 8.
It’s okay to trust that what you are doing is enough. You’re a great mom. Trust yourself to know what’s best for your child.
This website uses affiliate links. I may receive a small share of the sale of any products mentioned here. This is at no extra cost to you.
The next question was a mom asking for book recommendations for her son who is 6 and her daughter who is 11. She gave me such a great description of the kids and it was fun to think of what books they might love!
Listen to the episode to hear me read the mother’s descriptions of the children. They are just delightful.
This is a list of the books I mentioned in the episode that I would love these two children to have read aloud to them, along with a few I didn’t have time to mention but are worth noting:
These are the book I recommend for the 6-year old boy in this family, to read alone or have read aloud to him:
And these are the books, along with a few I didn’t have time to mention, that I recommend for the 11-year old girl: